In my December blog post, Ready to be Restored, I introduced you to Wendy, the young mother diagnosed with breast cancer, who’d undergone a mastectomy after extensive chemotherapy to shrink her tumor. When I spoke with her recently, her husband was laying new tile left over from the repairs they’d had to make to their home following Hurricane Isaac. Water had buckled flooring and caused paint to peel.
Likewise, Wendy is in repair/recovery mode after the first stage of her breast reconstruction. She underwent a DIEP flap procedure to rebuild her left breast, as well as to “re-stuff” (that’s the way I like to think of skin-sparing mastectomy followed by recon) her right breast. She had this to report about her surgeon and surgery: “He did an amazing job. It healed beautifully. I was blessed. I’m feeling self-confident. I’ve bought new bras. I’m wearing tops I’d dismissed before. I’m feeling good and looking forward to the next surgery. I’m excited about it!” Wendy’s second stage of reconstruction is about a month away. She hopes to recover in time to enjoy summer with her husband and very active 8-year-old.
In surviving all she has, Wendy has acquired wisdom beyond her years. “Here’s how I got tough,” she said. “I was 33, went to the gynecologist every 6 months, had my breasts checked, my pap smears, kept up on my health. When I went for my check-up near the end of 2010, I told him my breast felt a little different to me, like something was changing, sometimes some pain, nothing obvious. I wanted a mammogram.“He blew me off. The only person in my family who’d had breast cancer was an aunt, 58. Nobody in their 30s. He said I was too young for breast cancer, and a mammogram wasn’t necessary. I walked out of there thinking everything was fine, that I should stop worrying and just get on with my life.
“A couple months later, I had more pain. I went back to the doctor, and I said, ‘It hurts me and I want it checked.’ Even though he told me again that I didn’t need a mammogram, he finally ordered the test. It wasn’t good. Twenty-eight of 35 nodes positive. So I don’t take the first answer of ‘Okay, don’t worry.' I stay on top of everything now. I ask questions if I don’t like the answers. I wouldn’t be here right now if I’d taken that doctor’s advice.”
In keeping with her tough new resolve, Wendy researched breast reconstruction extensively. But after what she’d already gone through, she found herself overwhelmed by the information, the idea of more surgery, the costs. Then she attended the convention of the Young Survivors Coalition where she met other young women who’d had similar experiences, including having doctors who dismissed their concerns.
At that same convention, she was finally able to choose the surgeon she wanted for her reconstruction, after seeing his presentation. “It was time to get my body fixed." And in spite of her experience with her gynecologist, she’s been able to relax her guard with her new surgeon. “I go to him now and have complete trust. I say, ‘Do whatever you think is best.’ He’s done thousands, of all different ages and body types. I know he knows what he’s talking about.”And for anyone who’s lost focus - or never had it - on what’s important in life, Wendy’s battle with cancer taught her that, too. “I’m not glad it happened. But it’s given me a whole new perspective. I get aggravated sometimes by people complaining about their problems, especially older people who have seen their kids grow up, graduate, seen grandbabies born. I want to say, ‘Well you have your health. Other things - you can fix that. You can get another job.’ I want to see my kid’s graduation. I don’t care how big my house is. I just want to be here. Living.”
Stay tuned for Wendy’s next update post-phase 2 reconstruction. Here’s hoping she has another uneventful recovery in plenty of time to enjoy long sultry summer days with her family.
